


Stanford (Riley)

by tattooed324b21



Category: Girl Meets World
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, College, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-25 15:38:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17124089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tattooed324b21/pseuds/tattooed324b21
Summary: Maya applies to Stanford as a joke and get accepted. (But this time it’s Riley’s turn)





	Stanford (Riley)

**Author's Note:**

> When I first wrote this I did a poll to see who would get the pain and the winner was Maya but now idk Riley deserves this

 

 "Riley you are the best thing that has ever happened to me." Maya pleads.

 

 

 

 

"Maya, you're letting me hold you back. You're so talented, please stop letting me be the reason you aren't out in the world." Riley is so desperate for Maya to understand what she's trying to do for her, and her appearance shows it. Flushed and tear stained cheeks give her away. She doesn't want maya to see her like this, not now. She wants Maya to hear what she's saying, to understand.

 

"You are my world." Maya grubs helplessly. It feels useless, but she'll be damned if she gives up without a fight

 

"I shouldn't be." Riley looks down at the floor. Regardless of what this means for them, all she wants for Maya is the very best. And this is the best.

 

"I love you, you love me, what's the issue?"

 

"Love isn't that simple." 

 

"Isn't it?"

 

There's a pause, and Maya thinks maybe Riley will see things her way for just a second, until she sighs again.

 

You can't keep letting me hold you back! Maya, you got into Stanford and you're staying for me. I can't let you do that."

 

"All I've ever wanted was someone like you. Someone who would stay. And you've done that. You've done that practically all my life. Why are you doing this?" Maya has lost all resistance and her voice cracks.

 

"Because you deserve better. You can't let your life revolve around me."

 

"Why not? Why can't I put you over everything, isn't that what love is?"

 

"Maya it's not that simple." 

 

"Why isn't it!? Why isn't it that simple? What makes it so complicated. Because the way I see it, I will be more happy with you than anywhere in this world, because this world has let me down time and time and time again, but you never have. You're the only person in my life who has always been there, never failing. Why would I want to go into this world without you by my side, huh? Who's gonna pick me up when this world inevitably beats me down again?" Tears stream down her cheeks in rivers as she bears her soul to her girlfriend.

 

"Maya, you have to stop thinking like this."

 

"I never have to worry when You're there. I haven't had an actual worry in my life in the last twelve years. I don't want to have to face the world alone. From the moment we met, hell, the moment I was near your window, I knew I could never be hurt as long as I was with the person inside. As long as I was with you."

 

There's a brief moment of silence.

 

"When my father left, you made sure I knew how loved I was. You've always love me the most. You've always wanted what's best for me." Maya isn't trying to wipe away her tears anymore.

 

"I do want what's best for you. And right now, Stanford is what's best for you." Riley sighs and rubs tiredly at her eyes before she continues. And if I'm the only reason you're not going, then it's my responsibility to step back for you. You need to find out who you are outside of me. I can't be your world. You can't live in Rileytown anymore. But when you figure out what's going on in Mayaville, maybe we can bring our worlds together again." Riley hopes that maybe giving Maya hope that they can be together in the end will influence her decision. When Maya doesn't say anything for awhile, she knows what's next.

 

"You've always wanted what's best for me." She sighs. Riley nods in agreement immediately. 

 

"Of course I have."

 

"Riley I trust you. I trust that you only have what's best for me in mind. So if you really think this is good for me-"

 

"It is."

 

Maya takes a deep breathe.

 

"I love you." Maya sighs. "And I'll go."

 

Riley nods and wipes her eyes again before leaving their shared apartment. She gets maybe twenty feet down the hall before she drops to her knees in tears. This hurts, Jesus Christ it hurts, but love must have its sacrifices.

 

***

 

"Hey."

 

"Hey."

 

It's Riley and Maya's first face to face conversation since Maya moved, and she looks different. She dresses almost the Riley used to know, with floral print on her shirt and brightly colored pants. Riley's impressed.

 

"How's school out here." Riley smiles, gesturing largely with her arms.

 

"Oh, you know. It is what it is. They have a great art program." She nods. She seems disinterested, and Riley doesn't push it. 

 

"So..."

 

"So..."

 

 Maya clears her throat and nods slightly to herself.

 

Riley's mind is racing with one, the only question she wants to ask. Mayas fiddling hands and distracted gaze makes her think she's waiting for her to ask.

 

"What about me and you?" Riley blurts louder than she expected to. She almost wants to cover her mouth in shock of herself but she refrains, and swallows, waiting on Maya's answer.

 

"Oh! Um..." Maya looks down at her hands, twiddling her thumbs.

 

"I actually... Met someone." Maya shrugs. She looks up quickly to see how Riley reacts.

 

"Oh." Is all she can manage. Maya nods and looks down at her hands again.

 

"Yeah, in fact, I actually wanted you to meet her today, but she's sort of busy getting a project done right now." Maya looks anywhere but in her eyes. 

 

"It was my first day... I was lost or whatever and she was really kind and told me where I was supposed to go..." Maya stops when she realizes she's smiling at the memory, not wanting to make this any worse than it is.

 

"Right. Of course." 

 

Maya pauses as she watches Riley react to the news.

 

“I’m glad you convinced me to come.” Maya adds solemnly. She means the words, she’s happy she could find happiness outside of Riley. But to do that, she had to leave Riley.

 

Maya notices Riley’s eyes swelling with tears and suddenly her mind is blank. She reaches out to wipe her tears but hesitates, and pulls her arm back. Riley shakes her head and wipes her eyes.

 

“I’m okay. I’m happy for you. Riley’s voice comes out quiet. She sniffles and quickly tries to regain her composure. “I am. I’m really happy for you. I’m sorry for asking that.” Maya’s weak and stumbling attempt to comfort her ex comes out as empty meaningless sounds. She has caused her pain and has no idea how to comfort her. 

 

“And plus you know you still have another 3 years here so it makes sense you know?”

 

“Riley-“

 

“And you know I’m in New York. Of course you’d move on I don’t know why I even asked-“ Riley moves to get up and this time Maya doesn’t hesitate to reach out and touch her. Riley pauses and Maya has to think of something, anything to say.

 

“I love you.” She cracks out eventually. For a second, Riley believes it. Maya’s hand resting on hers brings back a feeling of safety and comfort she hasn’t felt in months. It’s nice. But the words. _I love you_ , they aren’t right. They’d barely spoken since Maya left. So, it used to be true. Maya loved her. But she doesn’t anymore. Maya realizes this just about as soon as she says it, and she almost pulls her hand back, but doesn’t.

 

She needs to be here for her.

 

“I love you too.” Riley says. She smiles a bit as she does and it makes Maya’s lips turn up a bit. 

 

“I wish I hadn’t told you to come.” Riley admits. 

 

“It’s been good for me.”

 

“I know.”

 

Riley’s done crying but she’s not done being emotional.

 

“It wasn’t easy. At first. I missed you.” Maya’s eyes start to swell and Riley’s eyebrows raise. “I really missed you. Coming here was the most painful thing I’ve ever gone through.” 

 

She pauses and Riley knows what’s coming next anyways just as much as Maya knows she has to say it.

 

“But I really am glad I did. Because now I know how to live without you. I needed this.”

 

It’s hurts to hear, obviously. She wants to pour it all out. She wants to change her mind. She wants to take it back.

 

_Maya this has been the worst four months of my life. I know you’ve moved on but I haven’t. I miss you so much I don’t know what to do with myself. I love you so much, please just love me too._

But she can’t do that to her. She can’t take this life from her.

 

“That’s good. You’re gonna do great things Maya. I wanna see how great you become one day, I wanna see you happier than you ever thought you could be.”

 

Maya almost points out that the way Riley has phrased it implies she won’t be in her life in the future.

 

But she doesn’t. Because she knows she won’t be. 


End file.
